Waiting

Something just occured to me the other day; I had been feeling that all hopes for the two of us were lost and I was going to sit in my little woe-to-me world. Then my mom asked me if I thought there was a chance for the two of us, maybe we could end up together. That's what got me thinking. He put on his blog the well known, let love go and if it comes back it was meant to be, otherwise not, kinda deal. How is it that we dated for about a year (not long by most peoples' standards) and are still in touch years later. How is it we get in so many arguments, to the point that we quit speaking for a couple months, but then are able to pick up again right where we left off. I know what it is: love.

I know that I love him and that I see a future with him. I'm certain he still loves me but is afraid of a future with me. I burned him pretty bad and now with an ex-wife, life hasn't gotten any kinder towards him. He said he's not going to go looking for anything, it it happens then he won't stop it. I thought about that and wondered if he was sort of referencing us. When I visited him in Houston when I was still early in my pregnancy, he later told me he had almost proposed. Now, we've gone through all the nitty gritty and he's coming to see me December 5th. I wonder if he'll be looking at it the same way he looked at the situation from Houston. I know he obviously wouldn't be in a rush to propose, after all he's still trying to deal with his ex, but maybe it would give him his own guidance as to whether he really would want to spend the rest of his life with me.

I look at this entire situation though and think ya know, I really think I have him, it's just a matter of time. There is something between us that despite the bad relationships and outcomes, we still come back to each other. I feel that connection that says he's it, he's the one and I just have to wait for it. So wait I will. Sometimes that's really the best thing anyone can do, just sit back and wait for the other person to come to them, knowing it's only a matter of time. :)