Happy Birthday to Moi!

Im legal!! Today is my 18th birthday, yay for me. :) I went this afternoon to see my great-gramma in the nursing home. We took her a new outfit that was for Christmas yet we seem to always forget to bring it. So my great uncle and aunt were there from Georgia so we all sat around and talked for a while. Of course Gramma didn't really register anything, just smiled and sort of dozed off after a while. Shes 92, shes allowed. lol

Then my sister called and asked where I wanted to go to eat, her treat. She mentioned a Thai restaurant called Teak that both she and my mom really like so I said we should go there. The food was fantastic, not as good as Indian food, but still tasty. We all agreed to get 3 dishes and split them. I got a tofu dish with pineapply, mini corn cobs, carrots and onions in a spicy thai sauce. I like a lot of spice but my mom reminded me that not everyone can tolerate so much so i should tone it down. I asked my sister and her friend what they usually liked cuz I guaranteed I would like it. On a scale of 3-10 they said a 6 was what they usually got so thats what we did. We also got a noodle dish with tofu, veggies, and eggs then another dish with seafood and veggies. The dish I ordered was my favorite, didn't have a whole lot of spice but enough to be noticeable. I think next time I go I'd get an 8 and see what that does for me. So I had a lot of fun, laughed so hard at times I felt like an idiot. Then, they would occassionally play happy birthday over the music system so I knew that was for me as well. At the end of the meal two of the gals brought out a cake for me which my sister had previously bought. It had the two candles on top that said 18, it was a chocolate and white cake with chocolate mousse and some creamy center that I couldn't place but was absolutely delicious. So theres my day in a nutshell, Im going to watch the ball drop tonight then hit the sack shortly afterwards. So happy new year to all, I hope everyone's upcoming year is even better than 2006!

Indian Goodness

I finally satisfied my cravings for some good Indian food. I hadn't had any for quite some time and was definitly missing it. So I called up my best friend who is home for break and told her we needed to get together and do something. Thats when she told me that for Christmas she would take me to any restaurant I wanted, her treat. So of course, I asked her if she liked Indian food. She said she'd never had it. I was aghast and told her of this awsome place which, in my oh so humble opinion, is the best place to get Indian food in the Cincinnati area. So her mom came along as well and she had never had Indian food though she said she liked Thai food. So we get there, of course its peak lunch hour but surprisingly, this huge group was just getting up so we waited less than 5 minutes for our table. Since I've been there many times before they asked for recommendations and I pointed out a few of my favorites, although I told them everything there would be very good. The previous night, before I knew we would be going out, I had actually had a frozen Indian dish of mattar paneer so the fact that I could get a double dose was wonderful. Since that is usually my preferred dish I went with my second favorite which is simply mixed vegetables with potatoes in a curry sauce. So my friend Brandi got the mattar paneer which is peas and cheese cubes in sauce and her mom got palak paneer which is spinach and cheese cubes. Then the fun part of deciding the spice level arose. Brandi likes very little spice so I told her to get a 1 (the scale is 1-6) and her mom likes a little bit more but didn't quite know how much. I told her it's better to have too little than too much so she got a 2. I usually get a 4 but remembered last time it seemed like very little so I decided to bump it up one to a 5. We ordered some naan, bread, to go with it. We talked and ate, the food was absolutely delicious (of course) and I realized I should have gotten the 6. The 5 was really good, had a nice kick, but still needed more. So I really had a lot of fun, it was nice to get some authentic Indian food, catch up with my friend, and just relax. Brandi decided Indian food is pretty good as long as it's not too spicy while her mom decided it was good but prefered Thai food. I could really live off Indian food, I think it's the best on the planet. lol

The Day

I think I can honestly say today has been one of the best days I've had in a long time. I had lunch with my three cousins and had such a blast. They are absolutely the sweetest women you could ever imagine. There is always that slight worry that things might be awkward when first meeting new people, but we didn't have any of that. Sarah brought picture albums and I was able to look at a lot of pictures. We had lunch at Applebees and just talked, caught up on things that have been going on in our lives for the past 16 or so years. lol I really enjoyed myself and hope it is something we can all do again soon.

Then tonight, my mom was in the mood to go see a movie so we decided on a 7:00 showing of Eragon. We went and saw my Gramma first who was doing surprisingly well and then hit the movie. I thought it was really good, my mom also enjoyed it. Well we were getting up and heading out of the theatre room and mom asked if I wanted to see another one which surprised me because it was so late. I asked her what she meant exactly and she said, well we're already here, lets do another one! So Apocalypto was showing at 9:20, it was only a little after 9, so we hung around and then just walked into the next movie! My mom never does stuff like that so that was really fun. This movie, was awsome. There is nothing like seeing a bunch of fit, muscled, good looking guys, running around in loin cloths with their asses hanging out. So setting aside the hot lead actor and bare asses, the movie was really good. Id definitly recommend it...gotta say the piercings didn't really do it for me but the rest was oh so nice. lol

Vanishing

I watched you walk out the door.
Tried to hold your hand but it simply slipped away.
Tried to hold you in my arms but you were already gone.
Simply stood, dumbfounded that I lost you in so little time.
Suddenly I stand, alone and unsure,
Questioning my every move,
My own sanity.
Should I have fought harder to hold on?
Or was it simply time to let go?
I told you I wanted you and I did.
I told you I needed you and I did.
And now I’m losing you and feel powerless to change it.
I may travel down other paths,
But I will never forget my first path.
The one that brought me both pleasure and pain.
So my dear, I may have already lost you or you might have decided to wait for me just ahead.
Either way, know this,
I will catch up to you.
One day I will hold you in my arms once again and never let go.

Doing the Unthinkable

I have now done something I never thought I would do in my entire life. I am actually connecting with the other side of my family. I was raised by a single mother, haven't seen my father, Tom, since I was about 3 (latest), and never heard from any other family members. Then, just a few weeks ago my sister called me and said that my cousin, Sarah, was looking for me via myspace but couldn't find me so she contacted her. Quite honestly, the first thoughts that passed through my brain were not of joy and excitement that some member of my family was actually interested, it was of shock and caution, a "what does Tom want now??" kind of feeling. Frankly, I was rather worried because I could see no good coming from anyone in that family. From what Ariel (my sister) told me, she seemed genuine and I decided to give it a go, meanwhile my mom cautions me about what Tom might be up to, I tell her not to worry because I already thought about that. :)

I did contact her through myspace and I must say, I have been truly surprised and really enjoying it. Sarah is married and expecting her first child. I did tell her some of my worries regarding the situation but she explained everything to me and said Tom knew nothing of our contact. She has been so incredibly sweet and I genuinely enjoy talking to her. I found out we even go to the same vet! How crazy is that?! I have probably passed her a few time because we are up there quite a bit with so many dogs and I wouldn't even know. lol So through her I also met her youngest sister who is just slightly older than me. Sarah has explained the family tree to me and even sent me a picture. I saw the first picture of Tom that I've seen since I was a little kid. Not quite what I imagined but I guess people can change a lot in about 15 years! So I told Sarah she could share our relationship with whomever she felt comfortable (mainly her parents and sisters) but that I would be very frank with her, I had no desire to be in contact with Tom. I don't think he'd want it anyways but I just wanted to put that out there to end any hopes or suspicions. So there it is, I never thought I would ever know any part of that family and yet here I am! I know I will eventually meet Sarah and her sisters, I would actually like to do that sooner rather than later, but I have to wonder if I will come face to face with Tom. Undoubtedly if our relationship stays open I know the rest of the family will be curious (at least based off what she's said) and then I will see him. I wonder what it will be like for us facing each other. Me, looking at a man that I have no respect for and have for almost 18 years referred to as just "Tom" and say hes really just a sperm donor; and with him having to stand there at look at his own flesh and blood that he has ignored for so long and missed out on so much. Will it be awkward or something mundane like a business meeting? eh for now I don't have to worry about it, I just wonder. I'm just happy to finally know something about the other side of my family!